The Hovercraft Rubber Drone Vagina

    The Hovercraft Rubber Drone Vagina

    Intimacy is a fundamental necessary, imperative to human survival, and while self-gratification has promulgated into a secret cult of taboo incorrectness, some has infused their unacceptable and sexual behaviors into technology. Gone are the days of hand torment, tendinitis, or risk of developing ulnar nerve entrapment, because of new technology “handual labor” is becoming obsolete.

    A new startup company called “Perversion Robotics” unveiled the Hovercraft Rubber Drone Vagina, a portable device capable of aerial stimulation while the target is in motion. It’s designed with carbon fiber for lightweight, with a built in motorized silencer muffler pipe system to curb and reduce sound. The device has a built in digital sensitizer that releases infrared radiation to track erectile engorgement.

    When a male becomes excited fluid engorges the genital organ, the gadget sensory motor and tracking device accelerates vertically into autopilot, positioning itself for sexual gratification. It’s computerized with an algorithm called “pendulum,” which allows it to oscillate horizontally, vertically, forward and backward when force or friction is applied. Manipulation is not required because the gadget is self sufficient.

    The rubber drone vagina accelerates in a vertical angle by implementing Newton’s third law of motion; “every force or action is contingent or conducive to equal reactive force.” Meaning, the trusting motor force protruding upward must equal the downward gravitational force to accelerate and gain traction without losing altitude…During aerial intercourse the vagina drone is designed to equal the force of a mans thrust; hence, if a man aggressively forces entry, the mechanical reaction can dismember his waistline or extract his limbs.

    The artificial vagina was designed using a soft elastic polymeric substance similar to latex; the synthetic rubber was extracted from plants in Malaysia to imitate the females sex-organ, it comes with built in lubrication that automatically heats up during penetration. The muscular tube leading from the females external genitalia to the cervix also contracts during penetration for a continuous tight-fitted experience.

    Although “polymeric” haven’t been FDA approved, many have speculated that the elastics molecular structure contain abnormal cells or cancer agents that can potentially destroy oval cells in the testicles that produces semen. The Hovercraft Rubber Drone Vagina is manufactured in black and white, it caters to singles, married and divorced men.

    The gadget self-stabilizes and can be programmed using a GPS tracking device to allocate its owners position; whether it’s hiking, camping, surfing, or any rural area void of civilization or exposure. The device is customizable to respond to sounds like “Lisa, Marie, Britney or Molly,” and it hovers to the sound it’s programmed to. It’s battery powered to give 10 hrs of gratification with two replaceable batteries. It also has a built in monitor to score heartbeat and measure calories.

    The startup received over 4 million in venture capital funding while giving up 55% of private equity stake in the company. CEO Executive of “Perversion Robotics,” said “this is going to be hard to launch, but we’ll enjoy the end results.” (No pun intended!) The product is still in its embryonic stages but will be available on the market soon..

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    Share your views and opinion, please leave a comment below Article Written By: Atelston Fitzgerald Holder 1st
    Academic Writer – Journalist – Lecturer
    The Harlem Times Ask A Newyorker News Blaze
    Musical Composer:
    Feel free to contact me at:
    Copyright 2016

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      The study of Spatial Schema, Semiotics, Phonetics, Phonology, Morphology, Syntax, Semantics & Pragmatics. Metaphor & Analogy in Physics, Music, Economics, Zoology and Biology. Theory of Light, Sound, Special & General Relativity. Hobbies; Music Theory, The Stock-Market & Equity Investing. Current Status: The Ghost of Ambiguity!

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